feedback and evaluation

Annual evaluation time is winding up here in my department, and I must say that all in all, the whole process feels a great deal like an extended month-long root canal. I spent hours and hours taking a template and picking and choosing the tasks that related ever-so-remotely to what I actually do, and then hours more evaluating my own work in each of those areas.

What a waste of time.

I mean, I understand that in a fairly big department like mine, it's important to have a paper trail, to justify rewards or punishments, and in a sense, doing a self-evaluation provides me an opportunity to tell my boss all the parts of my job that she might not have noticed. Our system, though, is far too tedious.

The whole dreadful ordeal finally came to an end yesterday, with my evaluation meeting with my boss. I was a bit concerned, not really knowing what to expect. I try to be fair in my own internal evaluations of my work, and I'd picked out some high and low points that I expected to be brought up. If constructive criticism surprises me, then I'm probably not paying enough attention. But sometimes, that happens, and it's always good to be prepared.

In the end, I shouldn't've worried. My boss had nothing but good things to say. She says she's thrilled to have me on the team. Her first reason for being thrilled was that I'm another female on this team that used to be nothing but males, but she said it wasn't because of that. She said that I immediately integrated myself into the team and that I spoke up at meetings and had good suggestions.

It made me wonder which meetings she'd been attending, because that's not my impression of my first few months on the team at all.

She even brought up the fact that at a recent meeting with a certain troublesome user who shall remain nameless, I spoke my mind and brought up points that he hadn't bothered to consider. I didn't tell her that there were things that I -wanted- to tell this particular user that she wouldn't have found as worthy of commendation.

The whole thing was very positive, and I was beyond relieved. I didn't expect a scathing condemnation, but I expected more points to work on. We actually had a nice conversation about what I feel would help me improve my own work. I mentioned that it's helpful for me at this stage of my development as a programmer to have as specific and detailed instructions as possible. I find it difficult to make the leap from point A to point B without a general roadmap to guide me on my way.

Today, I must say, I feel much more comfortable and secure in my position. It's funny what a compliment or two (or ten) can do for your attitude.